Your insecurity knows no bounds…
Well… yeah I just had a 7 hour text argument with someone. Stayed up until 3 and I’m feeling pretty rough…. No wait that’s an understatement I feel like hell. The argument in itself was stupid and completely my fault for starting it. I really hate myself right now, I ruined a relationship because I’m so insecure and stubborn and completely incapable of handling a situation logically instead of being an emotional mess. I jumped to conclusions and I rarely think before I speak, at all. I let my emotions run away with me and I don’t really know how to stop myself. I feel really dumb right now too… like am I really this stupid that I expected something else when I began this argument? I mean come on…. They were like ” you’re too emotional, you just say whatever comes to mind without even thinking about it,” and I’m just like…. Yeah that sounds about right… I say whatever comes to mind because if I think about I end up not saying it. Might as well say what I mean and mean what I say ( I sound like Horton from Dr. Seuss…) Well the moral of this rant kiddies is to filter yourself, keep a check on your emotions and for the love of all that is good! THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK!!!!!!!!! (or text) Seriously I need more practice with this… Please wish me luck with my relationship and that I don’t turn out like Alice where I give very good advice but very seldom follow it… I’m tired of being this insecure, emotional mess. I want to change myself and become someone that people want to hang out with and get to know better because she doesn’t go freaking crazy and jump to conclusions and get hung up on looks and self image and how others perceive her. Alright, I’m done.
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